步上红毯前的一堂课
HomiG 婚姻家庭辅导课程
美佳之窗 His Window 84（ Oct - Dec 2018）HomiG
资料：HomiG
傅庭辉&蓝淑虹
辅导员：何李颖璇师母
甜蜜的婚姻必须不断持续地经营。在美佳堂上了婚姻辅导后，我们明白了这道理，关系变得更甜蜜、更浪漫、更享受。
师母一直默默地给予200%的教导，让我们一起在婚姻的道路服侍上帝，婚姻生活过得更有智慧。我们感恩这些日子，上帝在我们还没踏入婚姻的时候，就不断装备我们。
一、在职场装备我们经过多年的职场磨练，我们明白了坚持的意义。在职场其实让我们学习到经营，必须设立方向、目标，才能达到目标，我相信婚姻也如此。我们会为我们的婚姻设下目标与方向，以坚持的信念一起经历。
二、在家庭上的装备我们父母对我俩的栽培，都是倾向自由独立，自己做决定和负责。因此我们在婚姻里也比较习惯给对方自由选择与决定。这样的婚姻比较舒服和有空间。此外，从小我们就参与许多课外活动，喜欢运动，因此互相吸引。父母从小的教导让我们知道只有爱才能够让感情更加深厚和稳固。
三、在朋友的圈子中装备我们我俩的性格其实有天与地的差别。但身边有很多性格不一样的朋友，而许多事情都须要团队合作才能完成。让我们学习到如何欣赏与配合别人，接纳人与人之间的不一样。
四、在恋爱中装备我们牧师和师母的婚姻是很好的榜样。师母告诉我们，在婚姻里凡事都要依靠上帝。上帝的教导就是婚姻最大的智慧和依据。经过师母的辅导，我们调整了一些对婚姻的期待，也学会了如何处理冲突和自我成长，学习“多想对方，少想自己”。我们也希望靠着上帝，我们的婚姻可以成为别人的榜样。
蔡光明&廖彩燕
辅导员：何李颖璇师母
婚姻是上帝所设立的制度，只限于一男一女，是一个至死不渝的盟约。
婚姻不但是相爱的男女彼此委身立约，一生以爱相随；婚姻更是彰显了基督与教会的爱。婚姻是如此神圣，所以任何人都不可以草率看待，也不可以玷污婚床。立约的男女应当认定，唯有按着圣经的教导来经营婚姻，才能讨上帝的喜悦，我们的婚姻方能享受属天的福气。
参加婚前辅导班，是其中一个预备自己踏入婚姻的途径。谢谢何师母忙里抽空辅导我们，在坦诚的对话里，让我们对婚姻有更多实际的认识。透过测验，我们更加认识彼此的优点、缺点和差异，以及学习如何更有效的配搭。在辅导员的带领之下，我们对一些先前没有想过的议题，也开始反思。虽然婚姻之路有挑战，但是我们深信上帝的恩典够用。只要我们愿意让上帝坐在婚姻的宝座上，并且坚持携手共渡婚姻里的酸甜苦辣，这将是一个荣耀上帝的婚姻。
感谢上帝的恩典，感谢何师母的辅导，感谢大家的代祷和支持。
Johan and Yvonne
辅导员：何李颖璇师母
谢谢美佳堂给予我们这个机会参加教会的婚姻辅导课程，我们感到很开心。何师母辅导我们时讲解得很明白，教会我们伴侣要如何相待相处，如何解决问题和摩擦。
我俩成长在不同的文化环境与家庭背景，John来自法国，我生长在大马。上辅导课以前，我们在解决问题时往往会有一些争执或意见不合。但为了避免吵架，大家都忍着，尽量很不甘愿地各让一步。这种现象令我很不安，我担心久而久之，我俩的感情会出现问题。后来我和他说，我们必须上婚姻辅导课，让我们以后懂得如何相处，让关系更好。幸好他很爽快地答应了。
师母为我们上了几堂课后，我们学习到很多，双方也了解更多，学到的都很受用。我们这才发现，原来男和女真的很不一样。师母也和我们分享圣经里一些关于夫妻关系的经文。我俩最喜欢的一堂课是：当两个人发生争执时，应该要如何应对。例如：生气时，不要破口大骂，要先冷静。因为口吐恶言随时会把一根刺永远留在对方心中，造成日后更大的争吵。
往后的日子，我们会继续努力学习， 谨记辅导员和圣经里所教导的来维持我们的婚姻。
沈子量和吴惠中
辅导员：符诗诚夫妇
揭开婚纱之前，回头一望，身边除了见证的亲朋戚友，还有脚后十年的足迹和祝福这十年的人事物
在何师母的细心安排下，符诗诚夫妇为我们做婚前辅导。婚前辅导（简称：婚导）班预备的课程，是深入探讨我们个人、家庭、经济，现在和未来等课题。
诗诚夫妇给于我们宝贵的建议，提醒我们在婚姻中当以耶稣基督为中心，建立未来的家庭。课程中还有一些直入内心深层的课题，让我俩深思和讨论，让彼此更加了解彼此的过去，在互动中获得更可贵的认知和认同。他们的分享，我们毕生受益。
我们也被安排到新的小组。这是家怡领导的新小组，可让我们有机会与刚刚建立家庭和即将建立家庭的夫妻有一个平台彼此认识，分享和扶持。我们很庆幸与这班弟兄姐妹成为组员，一同过小组生活，彼此扶持鼓励。
希望从婚礼踏出的那一步起，我们的婚姻可以在基督的带领下，活出祝福自己和他人的未来。
Jasper Tan & Sherrina Yeong
Counsellor name: Mr & Mrs Tan Ay Zing
My wife and I got married in March 2018. Prior to that, we attended the premarital counselling course which was conducted by Mrs Sook Cheng. The course which was initiated by Mrs Ho was an eye opener and prepared us with what to expect in married life. It gave us the opportunity to be exposed to various topics relating to our personal life, personality, family origins, conflict resolutions, marriage expectations, children and financial expectations.
This counselling reminds us both of the reason we are in this relationship and teaches us to continue loving and caring for each other after marriage. A wedding is not simply a ceremony to legally bind two people together but also to show our willingness and commitment to continue loving one another before God. Speaking of commitment in marriage, we’ve learnt to always give a 100% in everything that we do. Rather than split a task at 50/50 and rely on our spouse to complete the other part, contributing as much as we possibly can would always produce a much better outcome for both of us.
Through the guidance of our counsellor, we also learnt a lot about our negative behavior and miscommunication and how to overcome them. This actually helped a lot in our current married life as we are able to deal with conflicting situations much easier. We are able to communicate more effectively while actively listening to each other’s problems and try to resolve them together.
The experiences shared by our counsellors about their married life including the dos and don’ts in marriage has also helped guide us through married life tremendously. As for deciding whether to have children in the future, we both agreed that being a happy parent and having a healthy relationship is key as this will affect everyone around us including the children. In short, our counsellors have been a great blessing to us throughout the course and the knowledge that we had acquired from the sessions have been very beneficial to our married life.
Bernard & Siaw Ling
Counsellor: Esther Ho
We look forward to attending the marriage counselling classes led by Mrs. Ho as she leads us with wisdom and in a direct and effective manner. During the first session with Mrs. Ho, she informed us that marriage is a one-way journey and has no “U turn”. God created marriage to mould us to become a better person.
The counselling class has assisted us in dealing with our fears, expectations, anger and passive-aggressive behaviours that arise when the going gets tough. I learned many things from the marriage counselling that I was not aware of before and it helped me in sorting out our marriage. It also helped us to address and discuss about unspoken role expectations in marriage. Mrs Ho taught us to discuss our respective roles in our marriage that applies to career, finances, intimacy and kids. These discussions encourage us to be honest about our expectations from each other throughout the course.
Mrs. Ho also taught us that understanding our partner’s personality will help us to understand their actions and thought process. With premarital counselling, we can focus on positive qualities of our partner and work on other areas together after the marriage. Premarital counselling is highly recommended for couples. It helps us to accept each other’s differences and teaches us to appreciate our significant other with generosity.
