Expectations: Good Or Bad
美佳之窗 His Window 106（ Apr - Jun 2024 ）
Text by Rev. Matthew
Expectations. It is one important element of life that gets us through life, or disappoints us. To have expectations is almost normal and unavoidable. However, when it comes to our Christian faith, is it good to have expectations, especially towards God? I am a firm believer that God allows us to approach our faith with expectations, but how we manage our expectations and our trust in God, is something that this article seeks to address.
1. Healthy Expectations
To say that expectations are our human desires and must never be brought into our Christian faith, is denying that expectations are healthy and is God-given. Throughout
Scripture, we see people of God having a certain level of expectation towards God and their faith. The Psalms contains many such examples when the Psalmists speaks of deliverance from enemies, deliverance from sorrow, and safe passage through difficult times. We look at the different men and women of God, being called to do God’s work, and having an expectation of victory when their trust and faith is in God alone.
Scripture reminds us that expectations are healthy and part of Christian life. It is not something that God demands us to throw away when approaching His throne of grace and mercy. Faith and expectations are not in conflict, rather they must complement each other in order for expectations to be healthy and not affect our spiritual life and relationship with God. Looking into the New Testament, we see Jesus ask the paralysed man laying by the pool for years a very important question, “Do you want to get well?” The man laying by the pool for years always had this excuse as to why he was not healed - No one helps me get into the miracle pool. But, Jesus knew that it was not so much a problem of the lack of assistance that hindered this man’s healing, rather his reluctance to receive healing. Jesus had to remind him of why he was laying there by the “miracle” pool— to receive healing. But, Jesus also informed him of something else — healing can happen if he believed and put his faith in the right person. And that was why Jesus asked the man, “Do you want to get well?” If the man had no desire to get well, no healing would occur, for he would not accept any gesture of healing. But, if he wanted to get well, he simply needed to believe, accept Jesus’ healing, and be healed.
Expectations are from God, because not only does it come from our desire for something, it is also a driving force in receiving from God. When we have expectations for our life, it will drive us to achieve it. When someone sets expectations on us, we do our best to live up to their expectations (healthy expectations). When we come to church expecting life transformation each week, we will come with a focus to worship God and seek Him in the time of worship. Hence, worship becomes meaningful and purposeful. When we have expectations of a healthy marriage, we will work hard to defend our marriage in order to fulfil the expectations that we have set. When we have expectations for a strong family relationship, we will do our part in order to keep the family together. When we have expectations for our spiritual life, we will do our best to live holy lives, maintain a spiritual discipline, and listen to God’s will.
Expectations are good, they are God-given and they can help us receive and experience more of God. Healthy expectations complement our faith and helps us to grow into the likeness of Christ.
2. Unhealthy Expectations
But, just as there are healthy expectations, there are also unhealthy ones. And the Bible warns us against having unhealthy expectations. In Colossians 3:5-11, Paul is reminding the Colossian Christians on what constitutes unhealthy desires. And to summarise, it is anything that leads to or stems from sin. And when speaking of unhealthy expectations, we can safely say that it is anything that stems from our sinful/selfish desires.
Unhealthy expectations can also be linked to unrealistic expectations. Unrealistic expectations are not necessarily fairytales, but can be said to be “unscriptural” expectations.
If our sole purpose of being a Christian is for prosperity, miracles, and a better life (material), then this is an unrealistic and unscriptural expectation. There are some who come to faith or who convince others to believe in Jesus because, “Jesus can give you a better job, a higher pay, healing that you have been wanting, or anything your heart desires.” These are statements or introduction to Christianity that only serves to do more damage than good to those listening to this message. The message of the Gospel is never and has never been about what we want in life, rather, it has always been about our need for a Saviour to rescue us from our sins and eternal separation from God. Unhealthy expectations can also come in the form of “spiritual bargaining.” Imagine this scenario: you are in a life-threatening situation. And in the most desperate of times, you say this, “God, if you will rescue me, I will give you my whole life.” I am sure we would have said this prayer at some points of our life, or maybe heard others share their testimony. Now, it is good, if we are sincerely determined to hold up our end of the bargain. But, it becomes unhealthy, if we have no intention of holding up our end of the bargain, but only want God to fulfil His side of the bargain. That is why in Matthew 5:37, Jesus warns His listeners to, “Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil.” A strong message, but one that reminds Christians today to not come to God with selfish ambitions and desires.
Conclusion
Just as with everything else, expectations are good but must be taken with a dose of balance. To live our Christian life holistically, is to have healthy expectations towards God and to remove selfish ambition or desires from our heart. While this in itself is a challenge, we strive and pursue godliness until the day we reach our eternal home and are perfected in the image of Christ.